Listen, Thanksgiving is knocking at the door, and you’re probably already thinking about that second (or third) helping of mashed potatoes. But before you dive headfirst into the gravy boat, let’s talk about a simple plan to get lean, strong, and happy—without giving up your sanity or pumpkin pie.

Thanksgiving Day Survival Guide

Here’s how to eat like a caveman and still enjoy pie.

JOSEPH A. ARANGIO, M.S., C.S.C.S.

Mark Sisson, a guy who basically invented looking good while eating like a caveman, is living proof this works. He’s 70-something years old, weighs 165 pounds, and rocks 8 percent body fat. The guy’s eating bison burgers and doing sprints while we’re debating if walking to the fridge counts as cardio.

So what’s his secret? Turns out, it’s not kale smoothies or running ultramarathons. Nope, it’s living like your ancestors—minus the loincloth. Here’s how to channel your inner caveman this Thanksgiving and beyond, one primal law at a time.

1. Eat Real Food, Not Science Experiments

Think meat and veggies are boring? Not when you picture a cave bear chasing you to get to that roast chicken first. Load up on organic meats, wild-caught fish, colorful veggies, and healthy fats like avocado and nuts. 

Pair roasted turkey with baked sweet potatoes and roasted veggies. Want dessert? Go for fresh berries and dark chocolate instead of pie. Basically, if it didn’t roam the Earth or grow from it, don’t eat it. You think a caveman’s sitting there like, "Is this gluten-free?" No, he’s ripping into a hunk of fire-roasted saber-toothed tiger.

Do This: At Thanksgiving dinner, pile your plate with turkey, roasted Brussels sprouts, and a sweet potato. Skip the marshmallow topping—cavemen weren’t exactly gathering mini marshmallows on their morning hunt.

2. Don’t Eat Junk That Could Survive a Nuclear Blast

For cavemen, this meant dodging berries that made you hallucinate and get the munchies afterwards. For you, it’s sugar, processed junk, and mystery meat nuggets. You think your ancestors would’ve eaten a Pop-Tart? They’d look at that thing and say, "What is this? A coaster? A Frisbee?"

Do This: Start small. Replace one processed snack with a whole food. Swap corn chips for roasted almonds or baby carrots. Nobody’s saying you gotta give up everything—just don’t let the donuts be your primary food group.

3. Move Like You’ve Lost the Remote

Cavemen didn’t spend hours on an exercise bike. They walked, climbed, and hunted—all at a pace that wouldn’t kill them before dinner. Walking is free, people. But some of you are driving three blocks to pick up cow's milk. What are you, allergic to sidewalks?

Do This: Take a walk after Thanksgiving dinner. Get the family off the couch and do a lap around the neighborhood. Bonus: You’ll avoid that awkward political debate between your uncle and cousin.

4. Lift Things Cavemen Wouldn’t Laugh At

Lifting heavy stuff wasn’t optional for cavemen—it was survival. Today, it’s the key to building strength and keeping your metabolism revved. Look, you don’t have to bench press a woolly rhinoceros. Start small—pick up the laundry basket without complaining. That’s your warm-up.

Do This: Commit to strength training four times a week. Start with basic moves like box squats, push-ups, and hex-bar deadlifts. If weights intimidate you, try carrying all the groceries in one trip. Caveman training, modern style. Bonus: You'll fight muscle loss as you age.

5. Sprint Like You’re Being Chased

Back in the day, sprinting was the difference between dinner and being dinner. It’s also fantastic for burning fat and staying young. You ever see someone sprint at the park? They look like they’re running from a wasp. That’s the energy you need—just, you know, on purpose.

Do This: Add hill sprints to your weekly workout. Start with short bursts—5 seconds all-out, then 60 seconds of rest. Repeat 4–6 times. Pro tip: Make sure your hamstrings are warmed up, or you’ll be sprinting straight to the physical therapist.

6. Sleep Like You Don’t Have Wi-Fi

Cavemen rose with the sun and crashed when it set. Meanwhile, you’re staying up until 2 a.m. scrolling TokTick. Get it together. You think a caveman was lying in his cave saying, "I can’t sleep—too much on my mind"? No, he was out like a light because he spent all day fighting other cavemen.

Do This: Create a better bedtime routine. No screens an hour before bed, keep your room cool and dark, and aim for 7–9 hours. Caveman rules apply: No glowing rectangles in the cave.

7. Play Like It’s 10,000 B.C.

Cavemen didn’t have Netflix. Their idea of fun was tossing rocks or wrestling a buddy. You don’t have to go full Flintstones, but find a way to move and laugh. You ever try to get your kids off their screens? You’d think I asked them to solve world hunger. Meanwhile, cavemen were happy throwing pebbles into a pond.

Do This: Host a family football game or try something silly like frisbee or tag (again, warm up before you sprint so you don't pull a hammy). If the weather’s bad, make it a board game night—anything that doesn’t involve staring at a screen.

8. Get Sun, But Don’t Fry Like Bacon

Vitamin D is a big deal, and you’re not getting enough from that soy latte. Step outside for 10–20 minutes a day. No caveman ever got rickets. Look, the sun’s free. You don’t even need a subscription. Just step outside—try not to burn your face off.

Do This: Get some fresh air daily, especially in the morning. If sunlight’s scarce, consider a vitamin D supplement (but ask your doctor first).

9. Don’t Do Dumb Stuff

Cavemen were all about survival. One wrong move—bam, dinner for a pack of dire wolves. In modern times, it’s less wolves, more texting while driving. Some of you are walking into traffic staring at your phones. Cavemen didn’t have this problem. If they got distracted, they were toast.

Do This: Practice mindfulness. Put the phone down when you’re walking or driving. (Hard to believe this is actual advice nowadays!) Stay present, and keep your head on straight. Cavemen didn’t survive by zoning out.

10. Use Your Brain, Don’t Let It Rust

Your brain separates you from the animals. Intellectual stimulation keeps it sharp—so stop scrolling and start learning. You think cavemen were binge-watching Tiger King? No, they were figuring out how to not die. 

Do This: Read one book a month, try a new hobby, or challenge yourself to learn a skill. Caveman rule: Stay curious, stay sharp.

The Journey Matters

Here’s the thing: Cavemen didn’t have it easy, but they embraced the process. And so should you. Focus on progress, not perfection. Small changes add up, whether it’s replacing diet soda with water or sprinting to catch your bus. Getting lean, strong, and happy doesn’t happen overnight. But hey, if a caveman could do it without online shopping, so can you.

Raise a drumstick to progress this Thanksgiving. Cavemen didn’t count calories—and neither should you. Focus on whole foods, move like your life depends on it, and enjoy the ride.

Summary:

This Thanksgiving, channel your inner caveman—minus the loincloth—and stay lean, strong, and happy while still crushing turkey and sweet potatoes. Mark Sisson’s primal lifestyle boils down to 10 simple rules: eat real food (not science experiments), move like you’ve lost the remote, lift things cavemen wouldn’t laugh at, and sleep like you don’t have Wi-Fi. Oh, and maybe sprint once in a while—like something with sharp teeth is chasing you. Swap processed junk for whole foods, play like it’s 10,000 B.C., and get some sun without frying like bacon. Embrace the progress, enjoy the pie, and remember: even cavemen didn’t count calories.

To your success,

Coach Joe

Joseph Arangio helps 40+ men and women lose weight, gain strength, and slow aging. He's delivered over 100,000 transformation programs to satisfied clients around the globe. If you want to increase longevity with the best online age-management program, or you want to visit the best age-management program in the Lehigh Valley, you can take a free 14-day trial.