Ever wonder why some people seem to float through life with a smile, even when their world is crumbling around them? You know the type—stuck in traffic, late for work, spilled coffee on their shirt, and they’re still humming along like they’re in a Disney movie. Then you have the other camp—the ones who act like the universe personally sent them a bill for bad luck. Stub a toe? It’s the government’s fault. Raining outside? A personal attack from Mother Nature.

Believe it or not, it all boils down to one thing: what you’re feeding your thoughts.

According to Dr. Caroline Leaf, an expert in brain neurology, many of the illnesses you battle today are a direct result of your "thought life." The average person has over 30,000 thoughts a day. That’s a lot of brain traffic, and if most of it is negative, you’re setting yourself up for a bumpy ride.

What Are You Feeding Your Thoughts?

Research shows that an uncontrolled thought life creates the conditions for illness. Your thoughts can literally make you sick. Ever hear about someone who went through a breakup and lost 30 pounds in a few weeks? That’s stress, my friend. Fear alone triggers more than 1,400 physical and chemical responses in the body. It’s like your brain has its own demolition team, knocking down your immune system one stress response at a time.

The real question is: how do you take control of your thoughts so you can be in the "happy and positive" club instead of the "doom-and-gloom" club? Here are eight ways to do just that.

1. Be Grateful

Gratitude isn’t just some feel-good exercise—it’s a game-changer. When you start your day with gratitude, you set the tone for everything that follows. Instead of focusing on what’s going wrong, you train your brain to see what’s going right. Studies show that grateful people have better sleep, improved emotional well-being, and even stronger immune systems. That’s right—being thankful can literally make you healthier.

Start small. Get a 99-cent notebook and write down three things you’re grateful for every morning. You don’t need a fancy gratitude journal with gold-embossed pages. Just get a cheap one and start jotting things down. Even something as simple as “I have a roof over my head” can make a difference.

Another great way to practice gratitude is to express it to others. Write a handwritten note to someone who has made a difference in your life. Call an old friend and tell them how much they mean to you. The more gratitude you give, the more you’ll feel.

Want to take it a step further? Before bed, reflect on the best part of your day. Even if it was a rough one, find something good. Maybe your coffee was perfect. Maybe a stranger held the door for you. No matter how small, recognizing these moments rewires your brain to focus on the positive.

2. Serve Others

If you want to feel better instantly, do something for someone else. There’s a reason why people who volunteer report higher levels of happiness. It’s because helping others shifts your focus outward, away from your own worries and problems.

You don’t need to donate thousands of dollars or start a nonprofit. Small acts of kindness can have a huge impact. Pay for the coffee of the person behind you. Offer to help a neighbor with yard work. Compliment someone’s outfit. These little gestures create a ripple effect of positivity.

Research shows that acts of service release oxytocin, a hormone that promotes bonding and reduces stress. So, by making someone else’s day better, you’re actually improving your own mental and physical health. It’s a win-win.

If you want to make service a regular part of your life, consider volunteering. Find a local charity or cause that resonates with you. Whether it’s feeding the homeless, mentoring kids, or cleaning up a park, making a difference in your community will bring a sense of fulfillment that no material possession ever could.

3. Hang Out with Positive People

Your environment shapes you more than you think. If you’re constantly surrounded by negative, toxic people, their energy will seep into your own mindset. On the other hand, if you’re around uplifting, motivated individuals, you’ll naturally start to adopt their habits and outlook.

Think about the five people you spend the most time with. Are they encouraging and supportive? Do they inspire you to be better? Or do they constantly complain and drag you down? If it’s the latter, it may be time to re-evaluate who you’re giving your energy to.

This doesn’t mean you have to cut everyone off, but it does mean setting boundaries. Spend more time with people who push you to grow. Seek out mentors who have the mindset you aspire to. Join groups or communities that align with your values and goals.

And if you don’t have a strong support system right now, be that person for others. Positivity is contagious, and the more you give, the more you’ll attract.

4. Control Your Input

Your mind is like a sponge. Whatever you expose it to, it absorbs. If you’re constantly consuming negative news, doom-scrolling social media, and surrounding yourself with pessimistic people, don’t be surprised when your thoughts reflect that.

Take inventory of your daily input. Are you watching hours of depressing news coverage? Are you following people on social media who make you feel inadequate? Are you engaging in gossip and negativity? If so, it’s time to clean house.

Instead, fill your mind with content that uplifts and educates you. Read books that inspire you. Listen to podcasts that challenge you to grow. Follow social media accounts that bring positivity into your feed. Be intentional about what you allow into your mental space.

A good rule of thumb: if something doesn’t add value to your life, remove it. Protect your peace at all costs.

5. Take Care of Your Body

Your physical health and mental health are inseparable. If you’re constantly exhausted, eating junk, and avoiding movement, it’s no surprise that your mindset follows suit. You can’t think positively when your body is running on fumes. Treating your body well creates the foundation for a healthier thought life.

Start with movement. Exercise doesn’t have to mean an intense 90-minute gym session. A brisk walk outside, stretching for 10 minutes, or even dancing to your favorite music can help get your endorphins flowing. Studies show that just 30 minutes of moderate exercise per day can drastically improve your mood and energy levels.

Nutrition also plays a massive role. You wouldn’t fuel a race car with junk, so why do that to yourself? Cut back on processed foods and sugar, and focus on whole, nutrient-dense foods like lean protein, vegetables, healthy fats, and complex carbohydrates. Hydration is equally critical—drink enough water throughout the day.

Sleep is another pillar of mental well-being. Lack of sleep leads to irritability, decreased focus, and poor decision-making. Aim for at least seven to eight hours of quality sleep each night. Establish a nighttime routine that helps you wind down—turn off screens an hour before bed, dim the lights, and engage in a relaxing activity like reading or deep breathing.

When you prioritize your physical health, your thoughts become clearer, your mood improves, and you have more energy to focus on positivity.

6. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness is the art of being fully present. In today’s fast-paced, distraction-heavy world, we’re constantly multitasking—checking our phones while eating, thinking about work while spending time with family, or replaying past mistakes while trying to fall asleep. This mental clutter creates stress, anxiety, and an inability to focus on the present.

Practicing mindfulness helps you tune into the moment and gain control over your thoughts. Start with breathing exercises—simply taking deep, intentional breaths for a few minutes can reduce stress and help you regain clarity. Try this: inhale for four seconds, hold for four seconds, and exhale for four seconds. Repeat for a few minutes whenever you feel overwhelmed.

Meditation is another powerful tool. You don’t need to sit in a cave for hours—just five to ten minutes of guided meditation daily can shift your mindset. Apps like Headspace or Calm offer easy ways to get started.

Another way to practice mindfulness is by engaging fully in everyday activities. When you eat, focus on the taste and texture of your food rather than scrolling through your phone. When you walk, pay attention to your surroundings instead of mentally going through your to-do list. These small moments of presence add up.

Mindfulness also involves recognizing negative thoughts without attaching to them. Instead of letting anxious thoughts spiral, acknowledge them and let them pass, like clouds in the sky. With consistent practice, you’ll train your mind to stay in the moment, reducing stress and increasing happiness.

7. Watch Your Self-Talk

The way you speak to yourself matters more than you realize. Imagine if someone followed you around all day, constantly telling you that you’re not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough. That would be exhausting, right? Yet, many of us do this to ourselves through negative self-talk.

Your inner dialogue shapes your beliefs and actions. If you constantly say, “I’m not good at this,” “I’ll never succeed,” or “I’m just unlucky,” your mind accepts these as truths. But if you consciously reframe your thoughts into positive affirmations, you’ll start shifting your mindset.

Start paying attention to your self-talk. When you catch yourself thinking negatively, challenge it. Ask yourself, “Is this thought helpful? Is it true? Would I say this to a friend?” Most of the time, negative self-talk is exaggerated and irrational.

Replace negative statements with empowering ones. Instead of “I can’t do this,” say, “I am capable, and I can learn.” Instead of “I always fail,” say, “Every setback is a lesson.” The more you practice this, the more natural it becomes.

Writing down positive affirmations and repeating them daily can also help. Statements like “I am resilient,” “I choose to focus on the good,” and “I am in control of my thoughts” reinforce a positive mindset.

Words hold power—use them wisely, especially the ones you say to yourself.

8. Take Action

All the positive thinking in the world won’t change your life unless you take action. Many people read self-help books, listen to motivational speakers, and set big goals, but they never actually do anything. The key to transforming your mindset and achieving success is consistent action.

Action builds confidence. When you follow through on even the smallest commitments—waking up on time, making your bed, finishing a task—you prove to yourself that you are capable. Each small win builds momentum and reinforces positive beliefs about yourself.

Start by setting realistic, attainable goals. Instead of saying, “I’m going to be successful,” break it down into actionable steps: “I will wake up an hour earlier to work on my skills,” “I will exercise three times a week,” or “I will practice gratitude daily.”

Accountability also plays a role. Share your goals with someone who will hold you to them. Join a group of like-minded individuals who encourage each other to take action.

Most importantly, push through discomfort. Growth happens outside of your comfort zone. Fear, doubt, and resistance will always be there—but successful people take action anyway. As the saying goes, “Feel the fear and do it anyway.”

Taking action is the bridge between where you are and where you want to be. So, stop waiting for the perfect moment and start moving forward today.

Summary:

Your thoughts shape your reality. If you constantly feed your mind negativity, don’t be surprised when life feels like an uphill battle. But if you take control and start filling your thoughts with gratitude, generosity, and positive relationships, you’ll see a shift in your overall well-being. Be mindful of what you allow into your mind, take care of your body, and surround yourself with uplifting people. Watch your self-talk and take action. It’s not always easy, but it’s always worth it. Remember: What you feed grows—so make sure you’re planting the right seeds.

To your success,

Coach Joe

Joseph Arangio helps 40+ men and women get leaner, stronger, and happier. He's delivered over 100,000 transformation programs to satisfied clients around the globe. If you want to lose weight from home, with the best online age-management personal trainer, or you want to visit the best longevity personal trainer in the Lehigh Valley, you can take a free 14-day trial.